Space dimentia
November 25, 2006 01:54 AM I think I've totally lost it in some ways. And now it seems like I suffer from mutiple personality disorder. Haha. There's something seriously wrong with my previous entry. lol.
Anyway, to update, I didn't get burnt, cos I did the burning first. Muahahaha! Sometimes it's the only way. I was right though. I sometimes hate knowing myself so well, and yet not truly knowing myself at all. Walking contradiction. Oh well.
Toodles ^_^ |
Fuck Fuckity Fuck Fuck FUCK!!!
August 02, 2006 04:55 AM Excuse the profanity, but I have this stupid habit of making my life stupidly difficult for myself, and even though I know this, I don't do anything about anything. How can I be this stupid? Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! I know I'm bright. Not a genius, but smarter than most. Not to be vain, or mean. It's just the way it is. It's good genes. Science. It's nothing to do with me, really.
Which brings me to my next "pet-peeve". Why the hell is it such a crime to know you're smart and say so? God, it's not like you're claming you're this amazing person, you're just stating a fact. It's the same as saying "i'm a blonde" or "my left hand's nails are painted black and I haven't gotten round to painting the right hand just yet.". God people piss me off!
thankfully they make me laugh too. And for the same reasons they piss me off. I'm a confused little chicken who knows exactly what she wants in life. If she can get it without being fucked over again (which she thinks is bound to happen) is the question. Oh well, I say "Fuck it". Even if everything comes crashing down and I get left behind to pick up the pieces, I think it would be worth it all. Isn't happiness, no matter how brief, what we should be living for? I think so, and that's why I do what I do. Walk into mistakes with my eyes and arms wide open. Am I demented? I think very probably. Do I care? Hell NO!!
I'll probably experience more joy and good times in my life than most people purely because I'm not afraid of getting hurt. I'd rather only be miserable for a couple of months (collectively) in my life, than spending my whole life unhappy, because I was too scared to take any real chances. To afraid to go talk to that cute guy across the room. Too hooked on my misery to do what I know will make me happy, even if only for a little while.
I know I'm being stupid though. I know I'm going to regret this. It's fire, and oh how I love playing with it! It's a rush, and it's exciting and it keeps me coming back for more no matter how hot it gets. It's awesome! And in moments like those, I am happy. That's where I live and thta's where I'll die.
I bid thee all, my loyal readers (HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!), a great day! May you too discover the joys of living "it" a little. Just give it a try. I'm sure you'll be amazed : )
Toodles! ^_^ |
Charlie's Angel?
July 03, 2006 04:27 AM So, what's new in my life? I'm a barlady!! It's so much fun! Hard work, but fucking awesome! The place is called Lord William Charles. Or "Charlies". The regulars are mostly bikers (it's not a biker bar. This place is nice), but they're so cool and funny and respectful (well, most of them anyway). I work 6days a week from 4 til closing time (that varies from day to day) and it's awesome. It's my first ever job and it feels so good to be earning. I can buy stuff now haha.
Been buying lots of CDs. Got Fall Out Boy and Panic! At The Disco. They are just too cool.
Got to go, but I'll have a more deep an meaningful entry next time. |
So disappointed
May 29, 2006 07:35 PM Wow. What have they done? What indeed? This site looked so cool and was always so easy to navigate. Now it's trying to be myspace and I don't know what's going on here. It looks lame and I can't even find my friends' profiles. So so sad. I guess it doesn't really matter since I'm never online anymore anyway, but it just depresses me that when I do manage to get online I have nowhere to go anymore.I guess I'll get used to it, but I must admit that I don't particularly like change. It freaks me out and irritates me. It feels like the universe conspires against me to constantly keep me out of sync. The moment I adjust, it shifts again. Teasing me cos I can't keep up. Sometimes, I must admit, the changes is a good thing. But fuck, I can't handle it. It's not fair. I think too much as it is.Ok, gotta run. |
Holy shit.
June 18, 2005 03:18 AM *Wakes up after sleeping for three hours. Wakes Madmac up. Looks at arm*
Me - What the hell? Why did I write "Hello Bobbi" on my arm?
Madmac - Do you remember what you wrote on your leg?
Me - Ha. Ha. I never wrote on my leg. *checks* Oh.
LMAO! Man, I just drank way too much last night. The line between being drunk and being fucked is actually so thin, cos I was doing fine and I was complaining about being too sober and then all of a sudden I was just so pissed. Madness. I feel sick. I need food. I want an egg. And onions. But I should wait til Madmac wakes up. He's wondering how I am still alive while I feel dead heh. |
hahah
June 16, 2005 04:53 PM Capitalism and Cows
TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM -- You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy grows. You sell them and retire on the
income.
AN AMERICAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell one, and force the
other to produce the milk of four cows. You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
FRENCH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You go on strike because you
want three cows.
A JAPANESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You redesign them so they
are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk. You
then create clever cow cartoon images called Cowkimon(tm) and market them
world-wide.
A GERMAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You re-engineer them so they
live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A BRITISH CORPORATION -- You have two cows. Both are mad.
AN ITALIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows, but you don't know where they
are. You break for lunch.
A RUSSIAN CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You count them and learn you
have five cows. You count them again and learn you have 42 cows. You count
them again and learn you have 12 cows. You stop counting cows and open another
bottle of vodka.
A SWISS CORPORATION -- You have 5000 cows, none of which belong to you.
You charge others for storing them.
A HINDU CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You worship them.
A CHINESE CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You have 300 people milking
them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the newsman
who reported the numbers.
AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION -- You have two cows. That one on the left is
kinda cute.
ENRON CORPORATION -- You have two cows. You sell three of them to your
publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your brother-in-law at
the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so
that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption for five cows. The milk rights
of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island company
secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows
back to your listed company. The annual report says the company owns eight
cows, with an option on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the
United States, leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the
release. The public buys your bull.
ARTHUR ANDERSON, LLC -- You have 2 cows. You shred all documents that
Enron has any cows, take 2 cows from Enron for payment for consulting the cows,
and attest that Enron has 9 cows. |
Wasted.
June 16, 2005 10:01 AM Your mother came up to me,
She wanted answers only she should know,
Only she should know.
It wasn't easy to deal with the tears that rolled down her face.
I had no answers 'cause I didn't even know you.
But these words
They can't replace,
The life you,
The life you waste.
How could you paint this picture?
Was life as bad as it should seem, that there were no more options for you?
I can't explain how I feel.
I've been there many times before.
I've tasted the cold steel of my life crashing down before me.
But these words
They can't replace,
The life you,
The life you waste.
Did daddy not love you?
Or did he love you just too much?
Did he control you?
Did he live through you at your cost?
Did he leave no questions for you to answer on your own?
Well fuck them,
and fuck her,
and fuck him,
and fuck you,
for not having the strength in your heart to pull through.
I've had doubts,
I have failed,
I've fucked up,
I've had plans,
Doesn't mean I should take my life with my own hands.
But these words
They can't replace,
The life you,
The life you waste
But these words
They don't replace,
The life you,
The life you waste.
-Staind |
KITTY!!!! LOLZ!!!!!!!111111111
June 14, 2005 09:51 AM EVERYONE should take a look! [aww] It's just that CUTE!
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Bring me the Disco King
June 13, 2005 10:16 AM You promised me the ending would be clear
You'd let me know when the time was now
Don't let me know when you're opening the door
Stab me in the dark, let me disappear
Memories that flutter like bats out of hell
Stab you from the city spires
Life wasn't worth the balance
Or the crumpled paper it was written on
Don't let me know we're invisible
Don't let me know we're invisible
Hot cash days that you trailed around
Cold cold nights under chrome and glass
Led me down river of perfumed limbs
Sent me to the streets with the good time girls
Don't let me know we're invisible
Don't let me know we're invisible
We could dance, dance, dance thru' the fire
Dance, dance, dance thru' the fire
Feed me no lies
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Breathe through the years
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Bring me the disco king
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Dead or alive, bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king, bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king
Spin-offs with those who slept like corpses
Damp morning rays in the stiff bad clubs
Killing time in the '70s
Smelling of love through the moist winds
Don't let me know when you're opening the door
Close me in the dark, let me disappear
Soon there'll be nothing left of me
Nothing left to release
Dance, dance, dance thru' the fire
Dance, dance, dance thru' the fire
Feed me no lies
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Breathe through the years
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Bring me the disco king
I don't know about you, I don't know about you
Dead or alive, bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king, bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king, bring me the disco king
Bring me the disco king, bring me the disco king
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I know, I know... So arbitrary... It's this damn song that has been in my head for about 5 days now. Damn you David Bowie! lol! Yea, that's who t's by, in case you didn't know/realise... It's so damn catchy.
My cat has taken to biting me. Ok, so she always has, but now she bites me with intent, not just cutesy little nibbly of hand. No. Now she bites my arms or whatever she can get to. It damn well hurts. Stupid whore.
I have been stoned way too often lately. That could be why I am so damn lazy. Sometimes I hate myself so much. Like, I sometimes look at Madmac and it feels like my heart's going to burst because it's just so full of emotion for him, and it's insane. And then like other times, its the opposite. My heart feels heavy with emotion, but the kind that can kill and it's directed at me. Or sometimes people in general or someone I despise, but more often than not me.
Speaking of people I despise... I just want to clear a little something up:
I realise that there is a Stacy on this site. I also realise that we've had shit. I also realise that I have a Stacy on my "hit list". This does not mean that the person on my "hit list" is the person on this site. Whoever said anything to her (the Stacy on this site) about that, kindly fuck off. Same goes to you Stacy :) I have my very valid reasons for not liking you, ones that I am not allowed to discuss with anyone, let alone you. Also, I might be a passive aggressive, but for God's sake, I kinda figured shit was at least semi-sorted. You don't talk to me, or Madmac, and we don't talk to you. Issue resolved. Now please hold up your end of the bargain, thank you :)
Ok, now that that's out of the way I can talk once more of how I make myself sick. Or not. Fuck it. Negative thoughts are never good. Just fuck off and leave me alone. Who the hell am I talking to? No one reads this, really, except for "guest" who loves to leave fucked up commetns. Well, now you can't. You have to be a member and logged in to comment. No comment is better than a comment from "guest".
Is it too much to ask just to be taken away?! |
Typical kitty ^_^
June 09, 2005 01:17 PM This is actually so cute!
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